Do you often feel like you can’t connect even though you’re face to face with someone?

You’re on one side; they are on the other.

You have something to share; they’re not open to receiving it.

You want to know; they aren’t telling.

Communicating--a fundamental element of relationships and survival--comes naturally, but it sure doesn't hurt when people think more about how they'll relate to one another before engaging. Even casual conversations have implications, and all kinds of nuances play a role in interactions. Unquestionably, the details influence whether parities not only cross paths, but also connect.

Consider the following examples of how different styles set the tone and potentially alter the dynamics between sides:

Peddle vs. Persuade

Peddle – To promote or sell

Persuade – To influence or motivate

Tell vs. Ask

Tell – To state or inform

Ask – To learn or inquire

Insist vs. Suggest

Insist – To require or maintain

Suggest – To advise or recommend

Ridicule vs. Respect

Ridicule – To mock or tease

Respect – To accept or recognize

Shout vs. Speak

Shout – To yell or call out

Speak – To communicate or express

Ignore vs. Listen

Ignore – To snub or discount

Listen –  To hear or consider

Interrogate or Interview

Interrogate – To cross-examine or work over

Interview – To meet or consult

You might be reading and mentally tweaking my definitions or thinking of other distinctions. That’s great! My purpose is to encourage readers to reflect on the many angles available to gain and impart information in light of the potential consequences and opportunities.

Likewise, I don’t mean to infer that one approach is preferable or even appropriate for all situations. Personalities, protocols, and perceptions (among many other factors) are individualized, as are preferred outcomes. I will say, however, that genuine connections develop between the most unlikely pairs when both sides strive to seek common ground.

My best to you,

Sallie W. Boyles, a.k.a. Write Lady